09 August 2010

Two Birds

"Two birds on a wire.
One tries to fly away and the other
Watches him close from that wire
He says he wants to as well
But he is a liar."
-Regina Spektor, Two Birds

I'm the liar.

So often I drive myself crazy with cabin fever. I confine myself to the house. I've gone up to a week or more without leaving the house. Literally.

Why don't I just go do something? See someone? I have no idea. It would "trow off the day." It would somehow make yesterday different than tomorrow. Um...like that's a bad thing???

I love spontaneity but I am horrible at it. I really have to have it forced on me and I will usually enjoy myself.

This morning I read Maya's latest blog and I am so so so so happy that I did. Here is why:

As I sat down with my post-dinner hot tea and my laptop to write up my blog my cell phone rings. It's my BFF. She's leaving her house soon to get me. We are going to see our two best guy friends. My first instinct was: "it's kinda late." or "Now?" (it was 7:30...yeah...late, Kittie. Reaaalll late.) Instead I took some advice. Let something unplanned happen. I said okay, I'll put on some makeup and we can go.

I feel like this right now:
That smile doesn't come from just anything. People, that is a real smile. The kind that's so real it's borderline unattractive but it feels so damned good you just don't care.
There is one step I didn't take but I'm really not beating myself up over it. They bought a gallon of ice cream and the four of them sat on a bench and ate it. I didn't. But I don't feel bad other than it made me stand out. Luckily, "it's not vegan." worked just fine. But I did come home to the microwaved Zbar that I was craving (and that cup of hot tea.)

Let's rewind all the way back to this morning. (Seems like days ago.)

I had an Ezekiel cinnamon raisin English muffin...
...with sunflower seed butter...
...and my home made blueberry jam.
I love these English muffins. I hadn't had an English muffin in...years...because of the white flour but these are so good.

I am on a craving stomping roll....I've been craving scrambled eggs lately. The texture mostly which is odd for me because I usually hate the texture..?
So for lunch I made myself an egg white/spinach/tomato/jicama hash wrap.
Yes, I said jicama hash. I cooked it up in a pan with some onion and sweet pepper. I had extra on the side with diced cantaloupe.
This afternoon I did more organizing and took a short power nap....sound like any other day I've had recently....like yesterday? Sheesh, Kittie.
Afterward I had a Cookies n' Cream Luna bar...
...with cantaloupe and strawberries.
I always like a shot of the naked bar... ;)

Dinner was leftovers. I roasted up some romaine hearts to go with the celery for scooping.
I also cooked up some diced sweet potato in a skillet with onion, salt, pepper. cumin, garlic powder, cinnamon, and paprika. Very curry-like which is luckily what I was going for.

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